The Beard Monologues: Bernard

Since I like Star Wars and have a lightsaber that a friend of mine gave me in my entrance, there had to be a beard theme with that topic as well. Besides I think Ewan McGregor as Obi-Wan Kenobi has a great beard. In this spirit: May the force be with your beard! Another beard photo set with and monologue by Bernard after the jump.

The Beard Monologues - Bernard

While I was traveling through Europe my beard was much longer than it is now. One morning I slept in and didn’t have time to have a shower nor pack my bag, I had to get a train. Well you know how people wake up with beard hair, one side of the hair is all flat and the other one looks regular – well that happened to my beard. I lost my comb somewhere and the side that was flat didn’t want to fluff out with my hands. This way I had to sit on a few hour train ride with one side of my beard looking regular and the other one perfectly flat – dumb situation.

My celebrity beard crush is easily Hugh Jackman. He is such an Alpha male, haha. There are not many men who make me weak in the knees, but he is easily one of them….. Swoon!

The Beard Monologues - Bernard

Don’t get me wrong. I love a messy, untrimmed beard as much as the next guy. But I think there is a point where it can be pulled off and a point where it cannot. Even if you are Hugh Jackman. For me I feel that I need to wash and condition once every 2-3 days. Oh and always make sure your mustache is trimmed. Nobody likes looking at someone with milk from a coffee or food in their mustache.

Well, my beard has definitely given me some interesting nights out, led to a number of free drinks and a number of new friends and maybe even a kiss or two. I guess I can attribute it all to the beard. And yes, from time to time I get compliments on it when I’m about the place. I am always very flattered when someone talks about it. I never quite know what to say. Just smile and say I like yours too! haha.

The Beard Monologues - Bernard

This maybe be controversial, but I would have to say that there is a lot more people who “try” to grow beards in Australia (or well where I’m from). There are definitely fewer here, but for the better part, I think, here they are a much higher quality then those at home. I hope I don’t loose any friends over that comment.

Of course there are prejudices against people with glasses & beards at once and it hurts my feeling very much haha. No no, I get called a hipster all the time, but I think its a bit rich when someone hands out the label, because who isn’t these days. But whatever to it all. Its all fun and games, we’ll all look back at pictures of ourselves and say “what was I doing”!

Interview & Photos: Alicia Kassebohm


Alicia Kassebohm is a freelance photographer and communication design student at the Institude of Design Berlin. Last year she won the 3rd place of the Deutscher Jugendfotopreis. For iHeartBerlin she talks with interesting men about their goregous beards. If you are interested in getting your special beard portrait taken by Alicia feel free to get in touch with her at

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