How Americans in Berlin Experienced the 2020 Election

How Americans in Berlin Experienced the 2020 Election

Caitlin Hardee, an American who’s lived in Berlin for almost 10 years, slept badly beside her laptop on Tuesday night awaiting results she knew would not come by morning. With the presidential election still undecided until Saturday, Americans in Berlin haven’t slept much at all last week.

Because Donald Trump hinted he would declare victory before all mail-in ballots were counted, Democrats Abroad, the overseas chapter of the Democratic Party, organized a “Rally in Berlin for free and fair elections in the United States” in front of the Brandenburg Gate on Wednesday to demand all votes be counted. Around 50 people attended the rally with little commotion, but police were present to ensure social distancing measures were followed. Emily Lines, the vice-chair for Democrats Abroad, said that only two counter-protesters came to the rally. One of the counter-protesters was not an American, but still chose to support Trump and was not wearing a mask.

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How to Handle Patriotic Humiliation Abroad

How to Handle Patriotic Humiliation Abroad

illustrations: Ray Noland

Now is not exactly the best time to be an American expat. After the election results an Australian friend texted me “you had one job.” I knew he was joking but I could still feel the shame burning inside of me. Just because I wasn’t on the figurative plane as it barreled down to earth, my friends and family were, and there was absolutely nothing I could do to stop it.

Sure, perhaps I could have done more; like engage the few Trump supporters in my family or skip a night out to make campaign calls in swing states, but like many others, I was pretty damn comfortable in my bubble. I never thought in a million years that an orange, under qualified tyrant would succeed, so I didn’t feel the need to go out of my way. Instead, I just sat back and watched the disaster unfold from the safety of my Schillerkiez flat.

Immediately after I heard the news that he won, however, I felt shame. I worried about how the rest of the world would view the US. I worried about the damage that Trump would do to the environment, foreign relationships, and women’s rights. I worried about the future of my niece.

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Grieving Trump – Musings of an American Expat in Berlin

Grieving Trump – Musings of an American Expat in Berlin

I moved from New York to Berlin two years ago. In the past month it occurred to me to have an election party, to do something American, to celebrate the sure victory of Hillary Clinton. It would be our first female president and a steady, continued course of Obama’s slow progress. Also: a reason to socialize in the cold November night! I’m glad I decided against it in the end. The timing just didn’t make sense.

I stayed up until 9am that night, much more sober than other nights I’ve stayed up until morning. I followed the live updates on Reddit and watched the New York Times odometer tick mercilessly toward the right. I texted with friends from coast to coast, trying to make sense of what we were seeing. How could it be? What the fuck is happening!! I was in denial, unable to even process it.

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