Love-Resisters are like Genital Diseases

Illustration: Fernando Vicente

Madhouse Berlin: Therapy Session Nr.2

The Problem with “Aunt Agony” or self-help columns is that even the cool ones deal with the topic of love. So here we are and before you start telling me about your evil ex-boy- or girlfriend who broke your heart fucking the much younger and horny trainee, you should know that this time I want to focus my attention on a certain kind of Berliner who is unable to love. This inability may be one of the most dangerous infections and so to warn all you innocent virgin readers how not to end up in a world of senseless promiscuity and sex crazed-addiction, I collected some useful insights for you after the jump.


The Valentine industry has nevertheless done well in reinventing albeit at their “commercial convenience” the Grecian love god Eros who was formerly known as a sadistic psycho freak, feared in war because he forced poor soldiers to fall in love with some deadly creature who wasn’t ashamed of devouring said loving victim. So as a result, the Greeks weren’t too fond of Eros and instead preferred to have sex with each other rather than to search for that one ‘true love’. In Berlin, there seems to be a kind of ‘Greek antic’ revival when it comes to love. I would like to call these emotional disaffected, the Love-Resisters.

Love-Resisters socialize in packs like wolfs but hunt alone. They are not always attractive but have strong appeal due to their heartless attitude. They thirst for sex not because of the pleasure they get from it, but because they don’t want to “be pitied” for being alone. They don’t hate people in a relationship but like to think of them as codependent and weak. They are uninterested love so much that they do not even care about themselves. That’s why they often act in a self-destructive way.


If you become a victim of one of their kind don’t try to blame the big evil city or whatever. Get your ripped-out heart back and stitch it together as painful as it may be. I know that the sex with these heartless beasts is fantastic but honey, there’s more to life than that, believe me. The dangerous thing about them is that they can infect you with their way of thinking faster than you’ll ever realize and before you know it, you will become one of them.

So, do you think you are one of them and don’t want to be anymore? Well then, go get help. There is always a way to find love. Even in a city that sometimes seems as unloving as Berlin.

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<a href="" target="_self">Claudio</a>